Chal ek naav bana lein

Chal tu aur main
Ek naav bana lein,
Is barasti barsaat se
Apni chhanv bana lein
Chal ek naav bana lein

Itna hai shor har taraf
Sannata ek sava paav bana lein
Sath pani me chhap chhap
Karne ka chaav bana lein
Chal ek naav bana lein

Kuch tere la kuch mere hon
Milke saanjha ek ghaav bana lein
PACH pahunch jaayein kisi tarah
Pani pe chalne wala paanv bana lein
Chal ek naav bana lein

She loves him, and she can't believe it

She wouldn't have thought it possible, but there he was, with his naked bum on the toilet seat, rambling on about the amazing smell of his own processed waste. And she was cracking up with moist eyes.

She hadn't been an emotional person for years, nor had she been one to crack up in that time frame. She had seen the worst, been through it all with her head held high, brushed off the dirt, covered her bruises and kept walking. She hid her pains, she hid her loss, she hid her eyes, and she walked on like it was nobody else's damn business.

You know how you fall once and you get up straight and it takes courage but you jump into the world again. That's not what happened. What happened was that she was smashed into pieces, and left to pick it all up and remake herself from scratch. Which she did, but it told her one thing. That she was not allowed to be happy. That good things happened only to other people. That joy is a debt you have to repay with tears. She was so lost and she was so alone and she had a bag full of old pieces that she could not fit inside her heart again.

Sympathy is a horrible thing. You sympathize with someone you do not understand. When you sympathize, you automatically separate the person from you, creating this position of superiority for yourself from whence to look down upon them. And you throw pity to them like you throw food to the dogs. In a sense, you feel sympathy because you want to feel superior, and you don't have the belly for empathy. And she cleansed her surroundings from all that tried to sympathize with her. She tore apart the last shred of pity she or anyone else had for her, and she marked her territory with the tail of a fiery lioness.

How do you define success? Is it the number on your pay slip? The number of people who report to you? The fear in your competitor's eyes? The love from people who work for you? The difference you make everyday in others' lives? Is it the revenue your company makes? Or is it the explosive growth you drive? Maybe even a combination of everything above? No, success is no absolute, it's what you define in your life to be. And just after a few years of really trying, that remained the only way in which she wasn't successful. She gave everything she had to her work, without counting what she received or what she gave away. She earned it all, and she gave it all away. With something tugging at her heart that she was yet to find true meaning. She was yet to realize the dream she was meant to fulfill.

He didn't just walk in one day wearing a cape and tight overpants. No, he walked in pretty lost in his own world, looking up only when needed, talking to you like you were now under his debt, parsing only his name when in a room full of chatter. That was the first impression anyway. Turns out he could write, even rhyme, and did open his heart when in a gathering of amateur poets. Turns out she would end up sharing her dreams, her deepest self, and her entire life with him. A jigsaw of broken pieces came together, and formed a whole. With repercussions far beyond her sophisticated imagination, extending all the way to narcissistic ramblings about processed human waste. God has his ways.

She wasn't cracking up because it was funny, but because she was just happy. And her eyes were moist because she couldn't believe she could feel this way.

A Day of Disappointments

It doesn't take failure
to ruin a day

All it takes
is too much expectation

Mitli

ek nagar se nagar naya

ek se badhkar qile gaya

haathi dekhe geedad dekhe

nadi ke pani tale gaya

duniya ke sab kate chakkar

karne man ki akkar bakkar

ko shant nahi koi baandh mila

main agni ko chadh bhale gaya

jab chakkar aaya ulta ghooma

chakkar chakrane chala namuna

aisa zoron palat gira

ke aankhon mein andhera nira

aur haath wo aaya, halka komal

khada kiya mujhe zameen pe samtal

sthir tha mera yaar sang mere

charon oor tha ghume bhootal

jabse pyaar mila hai

ashaant mann ko mere

thamne ka kagaar mila hai

ek paak chehre ki kaaya

me wo aasaar mila hai

baayein hath ke adhoore chaand

ko daayan chhayadaar mila hai

pagle daayein dimag ko

baayan samajhdaar mila hai

tujhko jaise mere naap

ki razai sa sila hai

tujhko tere naap ka vaisa

mujhme bistar mila hai

ad jayein to jhuk jaye sarkaar

hum collector, ye duniya zila hai

hud hud dabangg dabangg hud hud dabangg dabangg

apne dum se har takhta hila hai

socho jo ek hokar

jawab har baar mila hai

ye mujrim kaid me khush hai

ise aisa thanedaar mila hai

ahenkaar ki haar hui itna

ishq khunkhaar mila hai

khoyi ruh ko ab hai karaar

aisa mujhe yaar mila hai

I miss you, friend

Hey complicated friend,

how’s your complicated life?

How’s your weird, pure mind

Does it ever rewind?

Hello, good friend,

I’ve missed you now and then

I’ve missed your computer

I’ve missed your room

Do you remember mangal?

1? 2? 11…

You remember watching,

Akele hum akele tum?

I got married and all

You would’ve been surprised

And yet you would’ve not

Bet you would’ve philosophized

It wasn’t your fault,

that we didn’t do robotics,

it wasn’t your fault,

that we did nothing at all

Let’s blame it on the times,

and my cruel arrogance

My planet-sized ego,

wanted nothing if not all

If you're a bird, I'm a bird

It's a different feeling,

To feel another heart in you

To feel laughter on your neck

Another breath on your chest

To fill up with something, and fall silent

To think of your entire life as leading up to this moment

To feel the combined force of a past well lived,

a present warm and soft,

and a future of possibilities, in one embrace

To behave like mad lunatics in public,

making an occasional old lady smile,

and whisper to her old husband.

To crave for more time,

more hours in a day,

more brain cycles to talk about things

To talk of friends, and childhood,

and being lonely weirdos,

and touch noses.

It's a different feeling to be married.